"We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
"We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals-usually brief-were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better."~page 30 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Page 25 continued...
If you are ad seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help.
There is a solution page 25 Alcoholics Anonymous
There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for successful consummation.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Gotta watch for the signs...
Over the last 4 days a certain animal has been making itself known to me.
Today I understand...
(As written in Animal Spirit Guides)
"If Turtle shows up, it means:
You've been going much too fast for too long, so slow down and pace yourself.
This is a time to be more self-reliant and less dependent on others.
Take time to nurture and simply observe and feel your emotions.
This is a period of increased sensitivity to the earth's vibrations and those of the collective human consciousness, which you'll first feel as sensations in your body prior to resultant emotions.
Spend a few hours or longer in solitude, away from other people and the usual noise that surrounds you.
This is a very creative, fertile time, and you need to shield yourself from interferences that threaten to distract you."
Powerful...
Today I understand...
(As written in Animal Spirit Guides)
"If Turtle shows up, it means:
You've been going much too fast for too long, so slow down and pace yourself.
This is a time to be more self-reliant and less dependent on others.
Take time to nurture and simply observe and feel your emotions.
This is a period of increased sensitivity to the earth's vibrations and those of the collective human consciousness, which you'll first feel as sensations in your body prior to resultant emotions.
Spend a few hours or longer in solitude, away from other people and the usual noise that surrounds you.
This is a very creative, fertile time, and you need to shield yourself from interferences that threaten to distract you."
Powerful...
...
It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
....
If love is so important to have that one doesn't want to lose it, why is it when we find true love we often don't notice it?
...
Be together, share your joy and sorrow, understand each other, provide space to each other, but always be there for each others need. And surely love will blossom to strengthen your relationship with your matter of affection.
Just another quote...
"If that lifestyle you're living has you takin' more shots than gettin' props: then that lifestyle has to change" Tupac Shakur
Sunday, March 25, 2012
The Doctors Opinion
From the book of Alcoholics Anonymous:
"Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks-drinks which they see others taking with impunity... unless this person can experience a complete psychic change there is very little hope for his(her) recovery"
"Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks-drinks which they see others taking with impunity... unless this person can experience a complete psychic change there is very little hope for his(her) recovery"
Saturday, March 24, 2012
A parallel of sorts...
He was nailed to a cross... A cross roads... Part of him died... He rose...
We've all been nailed to a cross... A cross roads... Part of us will die...we will rise...
We've all been nailed to a cross... A cross roads... Part of us will die...we will rise...
Can't deny God...
It's time to quit. Call it a spiritual awakening, an epiphany, or a moment of clarity. It's been calling me, slapping me in my face for over a year. I ignored it. I wanted to be different, I wanted to be the same as everyone else. But I'm not. But, yet, I am different. Different than those who are normal. Those who's lives aren't destroyed by the throws of addiction.
What finally got me here? I did things that can't be undone. Things that wouldn't have happened had I not gone down a path I should have known better to go down. Upon having that moment of clarity, and realizing my action over the last year I was ready to give up. Knowing whole heartedly what I had become, and what else was to come if I continued on that way-it's a very powerful feeling.
What makes me so sure...?
I find this(refer to picture) under my doormat, along with the key to my house that I requested an old friend put there... My friend only placed the key, and someone else placed the other... Maybe this picture is "the key"... I don't know. But whatever the circumstances be; the message was loud and clear...
The day I had my moments of clarity, all the while at work: this was waiting for me...
What finally got me here? I did things that can't be undone. Things that wouldn't have happened had I not gone down a path I should have known better to go down. Upon having that moment of clarity, and realizing my action over the last year I was ready to give up. Knowing whole heartedly what I had become, and what else was to come if I continued on that way-it's a very powerful feeling.
What makes me so sure...?
I find this(refer to picture) under my doormat, along with the key to my house that I requested an old friend put there... My friend only placed the key, and someone else placed the other... Maybe this picture is "the key"... I don't know. But whatever the circumstances be; the message was loud and clear...
The day I had my moments of clarity, all the while at work: this was waiting for me...
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
I apologize...
I apologize to my world wide readers, as it may be more difficult to read and understand my blog during this time frame. I am currently using the hand written form to express myself here. I am taking photos/scanning them to the blog... My handwriting could use some work... But can't we all really use some work...some cleaning up..? The writing is me, at it's core. Although messy; I believe the hand written form carries an artistic value, thus, the new project...!
Friday, March 9, 2012
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